Today’s post is courtesy of David Nour, the relationship and networking expert.

Top 10 list of what NOT to do in when it comes to your efforts to build and nurture real relationships :
1. STOP sending out blank holiday cards; they’re useless! If the point is to remind them that you’re thinking of them, personalize it by including an updated picture of yourself, your family, or adding a simple note about what you accomplished in 2005, and please – make those notes interesting!

2. DON’T mass mail anything – personalize every correspondence; you’ll make that much more of an impact. If it’s worth doing, take the time to do it right for a smaller, but highly targeted group.

3. DON’T ask anyone to give you access to relationships they’ve worked decades to build, until you’ve earned that privilege! Remember, it’s a lot easier to ask for a withdrawal after you’ve made a deposit. Find out what’s of value / interest to them – if they get the value of a relationship, they’ll find a way to reciprocate.

4. DON’T be anyone other than yourself! People can see right through a “manufactured” or insincere effort. Take good ideas from every possible source, and make them yours.

5. DON’T waste a single day; you’ll never know when it’ll be your last! It’s amazing even in 2005, how many people are having incredibility superficial interactions on a daily basis. Life is too short – ask intelligent questions to engage others and find out what they really care about and what’s on their radar for 2006.

6. STOP trying to keep up with the Joneses – I recently heard a great line: we spend the money we don’t have, buying things we don’t need, to impress the people we don’t like! Invest in fewer but real relationships today for an amazing portfolio with great dividends for years to come.

7. DON’T let your ego get in the way of a great relationship! Take the higher road and apologize for any misunderstandings, miscommunications, or misperceptions, even if it was their fault, mistake, or misstep.

8. DON’T keep score. Doing for others doesn’t have to come with an agenda or a quid-pro-quo expectation. Those who get the value of a relationship will find a way to reciprocate; those who don’t, you don’t need to continue to invest in.

9. DON’T let friendships you’ve worked hard to build, fade! Find value-added reasons to stay in touch by sending articles, useful reference materials, schedule monthly gatherings of like-minded people, or make it a point to constantly introduce people who could be an asset to one another.

10. DON’T feel like you have to do all of this on your own. Find a mentor, become a mentor, put together a mastermind group, join a new organization where you can learn from others, get politically involved in this year of elections, take up an active role in your favorite association, but make sure 2006 is a year where you made a difference!